So today when I weighed it said 194.2 pounds! Which means in 1.4 pounds I will be down a total of 50!! I can't believe I've almost lost 50 pounds, it seems like so much and something I never thought I'd be able to do in 3.5 months. My goal for my B-day was to be down 52 pounds which I think I will most likely reach and maybe even pass. Because according to MFP I should lose at least 2 pounds a week so by then I should be down 4 but hoping to be down 6.8. I got figuring things and to be at my goal by the time I go on vacation in 10 weeks I need to lose 3.4 pounds each week. I'm hoping if i do better with my exercise and keep a close eye on my calories then I will be able to get there. Even if I'm five pounds off I would still be thrilled-the doctor technically only wants me to lose to 165 but I'm pushing for 160.
On MFP there have been a few of my friends and people in the success stories post pictures of them right around 170 and I just think I'd give anything to look that way. I am starting to feel a little comfortable with how I look though. I use to feel so down about myself for my size, but through this I've realized I needed to get there and feel that way so that when I finally decided enough was enough, I never want to get back to that place ever again! Don't get me wrong I've always loved myself but just wasn't happy with what I saw in the mirror. I just saw me with layers upon layers of fat. And now with nearly 50 pounds gone I'm starting to recognize myself without so many layers of fat, and I love it. I do still doubt myself and get scared at times too. When I see the pictures of the girls at 170 and look at myself I don't see how losing 24 pounds going to get me to look that good. I look it the mirror and honestly think I would need to lose another 50 at least. But usually then I remind myself I can't compare me to other people. I am thrilled for the girls who have gotten down to 170 and have kept on going, and they really do inspire me and make me want to get there!! I just have to keep in mind this is for me, and I haven't been that size in a very, very long time. When I think of that I know once I hit 170 and probably even 180 I'm going to feel quite good. And to me I feel like I should be able too, even with 50 pounds gone I should feel like I accomplished some thing! Not alot of people, at least that I know outside of MFP, have ever done that when they need to. I still look at my mom who lost 150 pounds and marvel at how she did it. She didn't have a surgery, or used any weight loss pills or any fad diets she just changed her life style around and lost the weight. And has done such a remarkable job maintaining too. She still works out 2-3 hours a day, she is more lenient with the food but with a work out of 2-3 hours you should be allowed to. If it wasn't for my mom doing what she did I don't think I would care as much about getting healthy. Before she did that we never lived healthy at all we sat on the couch and ate McDonald's most days. But when she started to change it really impacted the rest of us. My dad hasn't gotten to a point yet where he wants to change and I hope one day soon he'll get there, but as for me and my brothers we've all gotten healthier in one way or another. I'm so very grateful for the example my mom gave to us!! I can't wait to be a skinny little women like her!
Well that's enough of my rambling for now! I will post new pictures when I hit the 50 mark!!
And I hope everyone has a great weekend:)
